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COLUMNISTS
TODAY'S STORIES
14.07.2008
How To Approach Women

According to this excellent piece in The New York Times today, Western magazines are finding a receptive audience in India.  This particular tidbit seemed worth sharing:

Some, like Maxim, seem to pride themselves on pushing the envelope of good taste even further than they do in their home markets. The magazine’s July issue includes the feature “48 Ways to Get a Gori” (gori is Hindi for fair-skinned woman, and is used in this context to mean a foreign white one). Some ideas the article offers: keep in mind most American women are extremely angry at Indians for stealing their jobs; don’t ask an Italian woman if her family is part of the mob; to approach an Israeli woman, try a suicide bomber joke.

No word on whether these tactics are helping Indian men in their quest for love...

--Isaac Chotiner 

Posted: Monday, July 14, 2008 12:03 PM with 13 comment(s)

Comments

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purcellneil said:

Suicide bomber jokes?  

July 14, 2008 12:14 PM

boneill said:

I've got a ton of them Neil.   Whew!  They are hilarious.

July 14, 2008 12:17 PM

rozenson said:

Note to any Sikh men who wear turbans: Do not try any suicide bomber jokes on Israeli women, or you may be mistaken for a dangerous Muslim. If these young women are in India, it is probably because they just finished their required army service and are taking a vacation. Let them unwind from the army for a while before talking about suicide bombings.

Other than that, Maxim seems to be giving pretty sound advice. And not a whiff of condescension.

July 14, 2008 12:17 PM

drozenson said:

"I am not wearing an explosive undergarment--I am just pleased to see you."

July 14, 2008 12:23 PM

teplukhin2you said:

Given the dollar's slide, maybe they should try chocolates and nylons?

July 14, 2008 12:30 PM

blackton said:

any word on how to pick up an Indian woman? Statistically speaking far more American men marry foreign women than the reverse. And in Asia I knew of few white American women married Asian men, but tons of white men are marrying Asian women.

July 14, 2008 12:44 PM

teplukhin2you said:

Blackton - based on my less-than-scientific polling of women from Russia, Korea and other points east, one explanation is that American men for all their flaws tend not to a) beat their wives and/or b) treat them like dirt generally and/or c) drink themselves into the gutter several nights a week.

July 14, 2008 12:51 PM

drdannyu said:

"I understand that you are extremely angry with me for stealing your job.  May I comfort you by performing the physical act of love?"

July 14, 2008 12:56 PM

adaglas said:

Didja hear the one about the suicide bomber who was hiding under a flatbed tarp, and his bomb went off prematurely?  His cover was totally blown!

Ba-dum ching.

July 14, 2008 12:58 PM

nbarry said:

Another reason why foreign women are attracted to American men is that we tend to be more faithful to them than their own.  The last survey I saw on fidelity said that around 25% of American men run around on their wives.  In foreign countries, it runs as high as 70%.

July 14, 2008 2:41 PM

epicciuto said:

I am very responsive to men who tell me that they have taken my job and blown up a school bus. I applaud Maxim for having its finger on the pulse of women everywhere!

July 14, 2008 4:56 PM

williamyard said:

Maxim has it all wrong. The goal is not to approach a woman; the goal is to have the woman approach *me*.

Want to see how it's done? Okay, watch closely, you don't want to miss it.

Here we go.

On your mark, get set, go!

[williamyard looks at watch]

[whistles a few bars from "I've Got You Under My Skin"]

[hums a few bars from "I've Got You Under My Skin"]

[looks out window]

[frowns, jots something down on note pad, crosses it out]

[looks at watch again]

[taps foot]

[tears sheet off note pad, crumples it up, tosses it into wastebasket]

[looks out other window]

[clears throat] Well...my work here is done...I guess I'll be moving along.

[pause]

I said, I GUESS I'LL BE MOVING ALONG.

[sighs]

[moves along]

July 14, 2008 5:52 PM

boneill said:

Epic, I've probably never taken your job.  How is one out of two for you?

July 14, 2008 5:53 PM