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COLUMNISTS
TODAY'S STORIES
30.05.2008
Green Light for GOP Boozing

Ian Swanson in The Hill has some important news for those planning to attend the Republican convention in St. Paul in September: Bars will be open late! Well, maybe. The Minnesota state legislature passed a bill allowing Twin Cities municipalities to extend last call to 4 a.m. (it's currently 2 a.m.), but the cities have to decide whether they want to take the state legislature up on its offer. St. Paul might not:

“It would be nothing short of a nightmare,” council member Dave Thune told the Minneapolis Star-Tribune at the time. He added that he wanted to spare residents of his downtown district the sight of “puking Republican lobbyists” in the streets.

What about the Democrats? The party of rum, Romanism, and rebellion has already lost its hold on Catholics and Southerners, and now it appears to be in danger of being overtaken on the alcoholism front too:

Bars in Denver, which hosts the Aug. 25-28 Democratic National Convention, also close at 2 a.m. But the mayor’s office has received no requests for extended hours and has no plans to do so, according to Sue Cobb, a spokeswoman for Mayor John Hickenlooper.

No requests at all? Disappointing. Where's Hillary Clinton planning on downing her whiskey shots? The convention floor?

--Josh Patashnik 

Posted: Friday, May 30, 2008 11:56 AM with 14 comment(s)

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benjamin81 said:

Perhaps Democrats are planning hotel room keggers?

May 30, 2008 12:04 PM

liberal reformer said:

Maybe it's BYOB.

May 30, 2008 12:23 PM

dylanposer said:

Thing is, Denver could really use some extra capital right now.   A Denverite by birth, I would conjecture that the group that would make the most of an extension of bar hours would be locals.  I say ask the Downtown Denver businesses and square it with the City Counsel.  Screw non-Coloradan requests.

May 30, 2008 12:42 PM

williamyard said:

"puking Republican lobbyists" verges on tautology, squared.

The 2008 Republican National Convention: Sponsored by Ipecac!

After they puke, do their heads rotate 360 degrees on their necks? Do they levitate from their beds before spitting on the nearest priest?

The Democrats' failure to push for extended boozing is troubling, however. If there's anyone of darker heart than a nanny, it's a nanny who doesn't drink.

May 30, 2008 12:49 PM

rozenson said:

To quote from The Daily Show's "America: The Book" Convention Schedule:

4:30 AM: Hotel is woken up by delegate screaming because he fears he may have just killed a hooker.

May 30, 2008 12:56 PM

liberal reformer said:

Willaimyard: Hilarious , as you so often are. Thanks for the laughs.

May 30, 2008 1:00 PM

bigfish said:

benjamin, I couldn't agree with you more.  Obama's core constituancy, college students, throw keggers like nobody's business.  They don't need no stinkin' bar.

Memo to the college students summer vacationing in Denver: DON'T BUY COORS FOR YOUR PARTIES!  You'd just be financing the opposition (if I remember correctly that the Coors family is fairly right-of-center).

May 30, 2008 1:04 PM

blackton said:

I think Hillary will storm out of the convention after a floor fight the first day that doesn't allow her to receive 100% of all the delegates in Michigan (after all, nobody actually voted for Obama did they?)

May 30, 2008 1:26 PM

dylanposer said:

Bigfish,

The social priorities of the Coors Brewery Company actually stand at odds with its namesake.  After he left his post to commit himself to politics, the company had to adapt to market trends to stay competitive with Miller and Budweiser, and has since splintered almost completely from Pete Coors's ideologies.

findarticles.com/.../ai_n6100761

That's why I'm back on the Blue Moon.

May 30, 2008 1:33 PM

ackyri said:

Do keep in mind which party will be more in need of those extra hours.

May 30, 2008 1:35 PM

bigfish said:

Thanks, dylanposer!  I stand corrected.  Feel free to booze it up locally, 'ye Democrats!

Yes.  Blue Moon is good.  With an orange slice?  Yummm.

May 30, 2008 1:45 PM

williamyard said:

These comments remind me of the last two stanzas of Dylan's "Just Like Tom Thumb's Blues":

Now all the authorities, they just stand around and boast how they blackmailed the sergeant-at-arms into leaving his post, and picked up Angel who just arrived here from the coast, who looked so fine at first, but left looking just like a ghost.

I started out on burgundy but soon hit the harder stuff. Everybody said they'd stand behind me when the game got rough. But the joke was on me; there was nobody even there to call my bluff. I'm going back to New York City--I do believe I've had enough.

May 30, 2008 1:59 PM

dylanposer said:

Bigfish,

Oh, no bother!  Alcohol seeks out the justifications for its own consumption.

May 30, 2008 2:06 PM

teplukhin2you said:

I'll have a Hickenlooper, please. Straight up.

May 30, 2008 4:00 PM